Drug Addiction Stories

I have been on cocaine for years.  I was married for sixteen and my husband got high with me, but then he cleaned up.  He wanted a divorce because I would not get clean with him.  We had two kids, a daughter 15 and a son 12.  We were both fighting for custody.  One night my daughter was injured in a car accident while out with friends.  She lost a lot of blood and we both donated to help her.  We found out that night that my husband was not her father.

That meant one thing. Our cocaine dealer from back then was her father. I tried to find him only to find out that he was dead.  He had died four years earlier from an overdose.  My ex told me he still wanted her, he wanted both of them.  Then he asked me if I really wanted to keep going the way I was until she was essentially biologically an orphan.  That was my wake up call.

I went into a residential treatment program.  My ex came to a session once with me and told me with the counselor sitting there that he did not condemn me as we had both been on cocaine.  The blessing of our daughter far exceeded how she truly got here.  Yet he got clean and he insisted that our children also deserved a mother who was clean.

I was in the residential program for three months. It was hard but after I detoxed I began to understand what I had done not only to myself, but to my children.  They never invited their friends over because they were embarrassed and now that I was clean, I understood that and didn’t blame them for feeling that way.

I am in aftercare now and I attend my meetings regularly.  I have a job making minimum wage at a fast-food restaurant but I have barely worked my entire life so that is a blessing.

My ex still has the kids.  I get them every other weekend and we are slowly re-connecting.  We decided  to tell our daughter about the past and instead of hating us, she has been really mature.  Her father assured her she would always be his baby girl.  I told her the dealer who was her biological father had died and she has no interest in finding out anything about him.  Her daddy will always be her daddy to her.

Although we are divorced and will never get back together, my ex and I have maintained a friendship through which we care for our children.  They live with him and I maintain a small one-bedroom apartment, but they come to visit and I am grateful that we all have been given a second chance at life and as a family.

Lady Gaga is a pop star quite popular in the UK with some of her songs reaching number one.  She has a life of celebrity status and a story common to quite a few in the music world.  She has a history of cocaine addiction by her own admission.

It is advantageous to youth today that a celebrity will come right out on her own and tell her story despite objections from her label and publicist.  She can perhaps let young people know that no one is perfect, if there is a drug problem seek help from your parents or a counselor.  Honesty from a pop star such as Lady Gaga could help more teenagers by bringing a positive reinforcement to the drug problems of today, letting our young people know they can receive help.

On the other hand, it does seem rather simplistic, the way Lady Gaga states she overcame her cocaine addiction problem.  For those truly immersed in the world of drug addiction, it really isn’t so easy as simply having your parent look at you and say “you’re screwing up” (paraphrased) and then you say to yourself “oh yeah, well I will just stop right now” (again paraphrased).

One also wonders if a cocaine addiction is really and truly over when she openly admits that not only does she drink but she “parties”.  What does that mean in the world of pop culture today?  We hope that double standards do not apply here for the truth is, one has either beaten an addiction or not.  If you “party” meaning you use drugs, then you are not really “clean”, are you?  However, party could mean something entirely different and innocent, such as simply staying up half the night listening to music and talking and dancing with friends without the use of any drugs whatsoever.

So perhaps we should give her the benefit of the doubt.  If she can present herself as a positive role model status for younger people to fight an addiction problem, then she deserves kudos.  The fact that Lady Gaga openly admits to the cocaine addiction can be a positive step for teens around the world to seek help.  That she is willing to openly speak of it despite what management around her says tells this writer that she may even be material for a book or could make a wonderful spokesperson for those who help young people fight drug addiction.

I had done my share of snorting coke back in the day.  I lived with a woman everyone in the house called “Ma”.  Ma always had plenty of everything; acid, coke, pot, whatever anyone needed.  I was young, stupid and looking for fun.  I felt so lucky that I never had to actually pay for any of the drugs as, well, seeing I was Ma’s ‘daughter’ and all.  I’d watch people come over on a regular basis to get their fix.  There was always plenty of laughter and fun.  Roy lived there too.  He was a sweet, southern man who had a penchant for cocaine.

Roy was one of Ma’s bodyguards.  He also fancied himself my boyfriend.  You know, that would have been fine had I not been witness to his descent from humanity due to his drug habit.  When I met Roy he did a line of coke every once in a while, but as time went on, he was doing it every day.  Not only that, but more and more every day.  In the two years I hung around there I watched his life disintegrate into nothing.  He began to get paranoid and hear things.  With a house full of people it is downright dangerous to be waving a gun around because of noises that are drug induced.  When he wasn’t on coke, Roy was so much fun.  When he was on coke he was overactive, paranoid, and dangerous.  Although I’d never seen him inject any coke, I suspected he was doing that too.   Roy started getting a little too dangerous and then the arguments began.  Ma would scream and yell at him and he would say nothing, but storm out of the house to cool off.  Eventually, Roy had the gun taken from him. There were just too many close calls for comfort.  I eventually left the house and went on with life, but Ma was arrested for dealing and Roy was reduced to living on the downtown streets trying to earn money anyway he could for his next fix.  He had definitely hit bottom.  He was sleeping in doorways of downtown businesses and had just become a shell of the man he once was.  Roy moved to Chicago, last I heard.   Maybe he thought he could score more cocaine there or maybe he decided to get help, I’m not sure.  I’ll always remember, though, watching what a short road it was to average guy to broken down shell of a man.