She Still Doesn’t Remember the Party
She still doesn’t remember the party to this day. All my sister remembers is that she experienced crystal meth for the first time that night and a feeling like she was on top of the world and could do anything. She felt aroused and beautiful and charismatic. She is beautiful but now she seems almost like a shadow of her former self.
My sister was a rarity in high school. She was sweet and special and gorgeous and nice. She was popular because she was so unique. If she had a bad quality it was that she trusted too easily. So when her new college roommate talked her into going to a party off campus, she went. When she saw some people there that just did not seem like college students, she was right. She should have trusted her instincts. She was nervous. She didn’t know where she was, though.
Her roommate tried to get her to loosen up. Finally, the roommate promised they could leave if my sister would just try the crystal meth one time. That is the last thing my sister remembers about that night. The next thing she knew, she was waking up in a hospital bed. Her roommate and several others were also in the hospital and one other person had died from the crystal meth.
The nightmares began haunting my sister. She knew she had sexual intercourse that night from what the doctor had said but she honestly did not know if she was raped or willing. There were times when she felt someone was suffocating her so just a few weeks after being released, she bought some crystal meth from someone who had been rumored to be a dealer back in high school. She just wanted to forget.
She began losing weight and our parents were not fooled. We held an intervention one afternoon and she finally broke down and confessed that she was using crystal meth. We got her into a residential program. One night she turned to me and asked if she could just tell me everything once and for all. I listened as my little sister told me of the nightmares she had been having, of the things she would do in order to get a fix and how ashamed she was.
I had just finished college myself and had been offered a position in a city about 200 miles from home. With our parents’ support, my sister moved with me so she could start a new life. We got her involved with a center that was part of the same group she had resided in back home and then she began taking some classes at the community college.
My sister went to hell and back during the time she was on crystal meth. Seeing her today, I am able to recognize her old self coming through. She has gained a little weight, she is smiling again and she is helping people who are where she has been. There’s a look of maturity and wisdom where the innocent sparkle once was. I’m just grateful to have her back.
She still doesn’t remember the party that night. I am kind of grateful for that myself.
