Drug Addiction Stories & Info

In one week, my son turns twelve.  I had him when I was 19.  I gave him life.  I also gave him fetal alcohol syndrome.  I didn’t even know what that was.  I had seen other girls and women drinking from time to time when they were pregnant.  They smoked just as much when expecting as they did when they weren’t so I didn’t think it was a big deal.

Till Billy was born. He was so small, I nearly lost him.  My ex-boyfriend took off when he heard I was pregnant and I did a little too much drinking to deal with the pain.  When Billy started school, he had problems with understanding and learning. 

Today, Billy is sort of an outcast.  He argues a lot with other kids and from everything I have researched, I am worried.  His counselor said he could be prone to acting out and even end up in trouble.  However, he also said that since Billy has been coming to for the past year, that he sees a difference in him and in me. 

Sometimes I used to get aggravated with Billy and then I remembered that I caused this.  How am I going to feel if he does some day get into trouble?  I try to keep him busy.  I keep him in church.  I have given him chores and responsibilities to do around the apartment.  I spend time with him and I am actively involved with his soccer team. 

He is going to be twelve next week but in some ways he’s so much younger while in others he is just so different.  But he has taught me one thing for sure: I LOVE HIM.  He is my son and I adore him and I am going to work hard every day to make sure that he does not become another statistic in the fetal alcohol syndrome books. 

I did this to him.  Therefore, I’m not going to let him down again.  I pray for forgiveness every day and I am even involved with a counseling group that tells our story as part of their way of helping others and educating teens on drinking and drugs and what they can do not only to the users themselves, but their unborn children. 

Next week, Billy turns twelve.  I’m proud of him and working hard to make sure he gets through life without any more fallout from my mistake of drinking while pregnant.  If you are reading this and you are pregnant, I am begging you, please, PLEASE, don’t drink.  It really will hurt your unborn child.

Stress used to be my excuse for everything.  I had a wife, a family, a job, a house payment, bills, the stress just kept adding up.  I seldom had time for myself, everyone wanted a piece of me.  When a friend slipped me some cocaine one night and told me it would help me relax, I thought “why not?”  We were on a business trip, it did not seem to have hurt him any so again, why not?

I did not realize that I was saying yes that night to just one more demand on my time.  At first, I thought it was just letting me know that I needed a break from all the stress and responsibility.  It took quite a while before I realized that it was actually the opposite, the cocaine was demanding more and more of my time, my mind, my body and my money.

My wife knew something was up but even in her wildest dreams she never suspected cocaine until the day she cleaned out my blazer pocket to get it ready for the dry cleaners.  When she pulled out the white powder, she was honestly shocked.  She came in to the bedroom where I was still sleeping that Saturday morning and admitted that she thought I was having an affair, but she was stunned to find out about the cocaine use.  She told me she would help me with anything and she would accept anything: an illness, me losing my job and working for minimum wage, but she would not tolerate drugs because of our children.

She gave me an ultimatum that Saturday.  On Monday she moved out.  Within a week, my friend who had gotten me started on cocaine had lost his job.  That was an eye opener for me.  I called my wife who was staying at her sister’s house and told her what had happened.  I told her I realized I needed help or I would be next.  My employer was a reputable Fortune 500 company but if I did not get help on my own, they might show me the door as well.

That was four years ago.  When I went into rehab, my wife came home.  We underwent marriage and family counseling as well as sessions to deal with my cocaine addiction.  Those marriage counseling sessions opened up our lines to communication in ways we had never experienced.

Turning to cocaine was wrong.  I do believe my marriage is stronger now, but it would have been nice to have just gone the marriage counseling route and sidestep the cocaine addiction altogether.  Still, I am just grateful we got a second chance at all.