Drug Addiction Stories

I remember being a little girl and my mom coming by and spending an hour with me at my grandpa’s house in Tennessee. She promised she would come get me some day but she never did. She was always out getting high and when she did come by, there was always someone new with her. When my grandpa passed away I thought she would come get me then but instead I went to live with my uncle and his wife in Kentucky. My mom did not even make it to the funeral. I remember I cried as much over that as over my grandpa.

I remember being a teenager and hanging out with my friends after the game. I boy I liked asked if I wanted to walk down by the lake with him. I said yes. We walked down there and he offered me a beer. Then he asked me if I wanted to get high. I said no. I remember my crush on him went away after that.

I remember high school graduation. My uncle and my aunt were there. Even though I had not heard from her in years, I looked out over the audience to see if my mom was there. I remember being upset that she did not care.

I remember college and my first job over the summer as an intern. I told my uncle I wanted to hire a private investigator to look for my mom. My uncle said he would take care of it. She was his little sister and he was worried, too. I remember telling him I loved him and was glad he was my uncle.

I remember when the report came in. My mother’s picture matched an old Jane Doe file out in California. They requested DNA from my uncle and myself and it was a match. My mom had been dead of an overdose since about a week before my grandpa’s service. I remember my uncle holding me.

I remember feeling I now had closure because I know what happened to my mom. I also remember the years I felt abandoned. My uncle set me up with counseling and I am doing better but I do not know if I ever want to have kids. I do not like being around anyone who gets high and yet I know some of them are absolutely wonderful people who just stumbled a bit. To this day, if someone asks me if I want to smoke a joint or “party”, I remember my mom and I say no.

I have been a drug addict for nearly five years.  I got hooked in high school at a party.   People say that is one of the easiest ways to get addicted.  I just wish it was as easy to quit, but it isn’t.  Other kids started avoiding my friends and me.  Some of my friends finally wised up and got clean and they even avoided us.  Not out of snobbery, but so they would not be tempted.

As time went by, I saw friends graduate and move on to college.  All I was doing was working as often as I could at the local fast food restaurant so I had money to get high.  Eventually, my boss caught on to what was going on with me.  After several repeated warnings, I was fired.

I know I am a drug addict and I need to quit.  Life seems to pass me by.  Do I just keep losing myself for a few hours?  It doesn’t do any good.  Whenever I come down, I still have the same problems: no job, no goals, just a monumental need to get high again.  The desperation of an addict is even worse when he they no money to pay for drugs.  This affected my relationships with family and my closest friends.

A friend’s mom gave me a phone number for a rehab place.  She told me there was something special inside of me that needed to be found.  She told me I needed to give this something special a chance.  She said it would be hard, probably the hardest thing I will ever do, but nothing worth having in life comes easy.

I know what I have to do.  I stared at the phone number my friend’s mom gave me for hours that night.  I could not sleep.  I could not think.  The need for drugs burned within me.  I could not remember the last time I got excited over anything that was not drug related.  My life was passing by and all I lived for was drugs.

The next morning I picked up the phone and dialed the number on the sheet of paper.  When it was answered, I told the truth: “I know I am a drug addict and I need to quit.”  Saying the words out loud was the first step of my addiction recovery.