Moment of Truth
As a peer educator, I went to more frat houses than I ever thought I would. I was 19, and it was fun to say, ‘Why, yes, I teach the fraternities and sororities how to drink!’ The number of times this was actually true startled me- drinking is everywhere, but few students considered it dangerous. There’s one fraternity brother I’ll never forget- I never knew his name, but I’ll always remember the look on his face by the end of it all. We’ll call him The Guy. The night started with a story I’d told many times:
In 1997 an 18 year-old MIT student drank himself to death in a room full of people without anyone noticing.
He had a few drinks, then a few more. He lost consciousness. His breathing slowed and stopped. His heart stopped. By the time the student reached the hospital, the alcohol content of his blood had reached .41. To put it another way, the young man’s blood was 80 proof!
The Guy was obviously unhappy that I interrupted The Simpsons with what he thought was a temperance lecture. He started firing questions: How many drinks does it take to kill you? How many drinks does it take before you pass out? He couldn’t believe this kid had just gone to sleep drunk and never woke up. He talked about how it took six beers before he felt buzzed at all.
So, we talked about drug tolerance. A person who drinks a lot needs to drink more and more to feel the effects. We talked about hangovers, and how they’re a mild case of withdrawal. We talked about what it means to ‘need’ a drink and to ‘want’ a drink. We talked about blackouts. We talked about consequences- missed classes, relatives who worry about your drinking, DUIs, priorities. Over all, when bad things happen because you’re drinking and you drink anyway, you should talk to someone.
I assured The Guy that waking up somewhere strange more than once or twice in your life and missing work Monday is definitely cause for concern and needs immediate action. He laughed, but it faded fast. He was thinking.
Then he asked, ‘Don’t you have to drink every day to be an alcoholic?’ I explained what a ‘functional alcoholic’ is. A person can be completely dependent on alcohol, helpless to it, while still appearing to hold down a job and operate in society. The liver can still be eroding, the family life deteriorating, the brain and pancreas permanently damaged, but the paychecks might come in just the same. If a weekend warrior can’t make it through the week without the hope of that party…there’s a problem.
The Guy got quiet. So did the rest of the room. I wrapped up the talk quickly, returning them to the cartoon adventures of America’s favorite alcoholic. A couple of fellows walked me out, including The Guy, who said nothing and shook my hand. He was pale, but I could see it in his face: He’d realized that he had a problem. I surreptitiously made sure he had a pamphlet with contact information. The Guy was lucky – not everyone is going to hand you the number to call. If you think you might have a problem, talk with someone as soon as you can.
